the first viola

I was going to write something about her. But, I can't find the right words. Let the pictures transmit her awesome.

potty time

We got Z a little potty, and we talked about it. But, we haven't been taking her to go sit in it or putting training pants on her or anything. She didn't seem interested. So, we were waiting for her to come around.

Yesterday, she asked daddy if she could go potty. He took her, and on her first try, she used the potty to pee. I am as proud as that first day she put food in her mouth. I am also starting to look forward to not fighting her to get a new diaper on. She is getting strong.

V, on the other hand has, since my last post, completely mastered the pull to stand. She stands up on a dime. Here's a picture.

jolly days

Viola pulled herself up to sitting! She was so proud of herself the first time she did it. And now she is doing it all the time. I just think about her journey through gross motor skills development and it is so much funnier than Zola, who was just happy to sit in one place until someone brought her something to eat. Viola on the other hand has been constantly a wandering soul, whatever it takes. As soon as she figured out how to roll front to back and back to front, she was looking over her shoulder at what she wanted and starting to roll to it. And like those robot vacuums and remote control cars, she would get jammed between chair legs and walls, or ram something she didn't see too hard and it would end badly. But that never stopped her. Then she figured out that the push-up inched her backward a little. So, she'd look back behind herself to orient and start chugging off backward. As soon as she could add the toe-push and go forward like an army man under razor wire, she was unstoppable. Like a snake, she could edge along head-on. Just in the last couple of weeks, she has mastered her leg movement and is doing a lot of yoga now... downward facing dog and cat pose. Pretty soon, she is going to figure out the stepping motions for utility and the rug-burned calluses on her knees and elbows might reduce. But, it hardly matters. I clocked her crossing the room in 5 seconds yesterday.

She and Zola have figured out how to interact. They like to lay on the floor and climb on one another. Viola gets up on Zola's tummy (with a spotter) and they tickle each other. They play patty cake, hand each other toys, and sometimes Zola plays "mommy" and takes care of Viola... or lets mom &/or dad know if baby needs a diaper.

Zola's language skills are through the roof and everyday she surprises us with what she knows and can repeat. She can do three syllable words. Her favorite things are elephants, kisses, going to the gym childcare (she knows the building so we have to avoid that street when we aren't going there or she will cry), swinging, cooking (helping mom make dinner or pretending in her new play kitchen), books, and pushing carts/strollers. Her favorite foods are milk, cheese, eggs, and meat (deli slices, pepperoni, but not chunks of chicken or beef unless it is chopped up fine and has taco seasoning.) She loves chips with salsa and spicy food. She can drink from a glass, although she still wants her milk in a sippy cup when she is tired. And she can feed herself with a spoon and fork (but prefers to eat with her fingers for convenience.) She's not a messy eater and gets very upset when food gets on her. She doesn't like her stuff to be put away. She wants everything out at once. She loves her tutu and boots and wants to wear them every day. She still hasn't shown any interest in potty training, and we aren't going to push it.

For the holiday, I was off for a 4-day weekend. Mostly I cooked and baked and cleaned the kitchen.

For Christmas Eve, we had a Mexican food feast. Since you can't really find good mexican food here in Cleveland, I learned how to make tortillas and used a mock Filibertos rice and beans recipe to make everything from scratch. We also had queso, ground beef taco bar, and tacquitos (from a box.)

For Christmas morning, I prepared (in advance) homemade cinnamon rolls with lemon cream cheese frosting. (MMMMM!)

For the afternoon feast on Christmas Day, I prepared a half-ham in a peach and brown sugar glaze, a cheesy broccoli rice casserole (a family favorite from Aunt Viola), and homemade focaccia rolls. The rolls were a little hard, so I made a second batch of bread later in the day so that we could enjoy fluffy rolls. The second batch turned out perfect and I realized my mistake. Whenever you half a recipe, always re-write the amounts so you aren't just doing the math in your head. I always forget and use the full amount the recipe calls for with at least one dang item and spoil it.

On Monday, since I didn't have to work, we had a family day. We took the kids to the zoo, tried out another (sadly disappointing) mexican food restaurant, and then looked at houses. We only have a couple of restaurants left... and so far, there is only one type of south of the border food here. It's bland, not spicy at all, all the stuff on the plate is either runny or covered in a runny sauce and touching and the meat is always stewed and shredded. I miss the nuances of El Salvador, Cuba, and the baja coast of Mexico and their limes and grills, when chipotle was a spicy pepper in adobo sauce that could burn your eyeballs out, and the fresh corn and black bean goodness of Tex-Mex, and burritos that you put in your fist. You would think I could open a restaurant and make a killing, but the sad truth is that people here cannot palate the flavors. Things on the menu here that are marked "spicy" can compete with Taco Bell's mild sauce. Things are bland here for a reason.

I have tons and tons of video of the kids right now. But for some reason, we've been negligent about taking pictures. I need to beat myself up about that. What's a scrapbooker going to do? I'll post some visuals soon.

snow days

My toddler LOVES the white stuff.

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thanks.

We drove up to Baltimore and Washington D.C. for the holiday, saw Nick & Tanya, ate wonderful food, toured the city, and showed off our cuties. We really enjoyed the city and had a great time.

Since coming home, Zola has demonstrated her ability to recognize every single letter of the alphabet by sight in no particular order and Viola has taken her first tentative crawls like a non-soldier / non-amphibian person. She also figured out how to laugh hysterically out loud and return her big sister's hugs (can't explain the adorable.) I have a cold now and a work load that might eventually kill me. I am spoiled from the vaca.

cute story

Zola thinks her name is "cute" or alternatively "you." Every once in a while, she will call herself Zoe or Zola. But most of the time she will argue indefinitely with you that her name is "Cute."

The other day, I caught her using something as a step stool to get the scissors off the kitchen table. The step-stool she was using? Her baby sister. She was standing with both feet, full weight, on Viola's tummy. Viola was just giggling like a complicit accomplice and was not harmed in any way during the telling of this story.

My hair is too long. Not only was I able to create a mural of Michael Jackson on the bathroom wall with the hair that falls out during a single shower but I'm now worse than living with a dog. My hair is everywhere in the house. We found one long hair hanging out of Viola's eye. It was wrapped around the back of her eyeball. (I was able to gently massage it out.)

I asked Zola if she needed a diaper. She bent over, touched the floor in what yoga calls the "Downward Dog" and subsequently farted on command - five times (while laughing her head off.) She makes more fart jokes than anyone in the house. Also, on a similar note, I mastered my chili recipe using dry beans and spices (not canned beans and packets) - very proud of myself.

I think Zola has upwards closer to 50o words now. And Viola is sitting up for nearly a half-minute by herself now. It is so hard to see them grow up so quickly and not be home with them more. I get the cranky, tired final moments in their day -- dad gets the happy, playful, joyful moments (but also the monotonous daily grind associated with meeting their basic needs hour after hour throughout the day.) Wish there was a way to spread out their care between us better.

the good stuff

To keep you coming back....

photo nuggets from this week

I don't know what MJ was talking about. As far as I'm concerned, THIS is it.

side-by-side

L: z at 8 weeks. R: v at 4 months in same dress as z at left. C: z at 4 months.

Fun to see the similarities and differences.

zola in september

Every once in a while, Mark proves himself an artist with gems such as this:



The video camera he wanted before Viola was born just paid for itself.

OH!

In a shocking twist of events, I like Ohio a lot! Who would have guessed? But here we are, transplants in a four-season State for the first time ever for Mark and the first time in 18 years for me. In a month or so, the leaves will change as a symbol of our new chapter.

Here's how we got here and why I haven't been updating this here bloggie:

We packed our entire household into shipping/storage containers Jun 27th and left Los Angeles for our great family odyssey while we are both on leave to bond with Viola. We packed in so much activity and travel that we really haven't had a chance to post, which is a shame. We had some of the most epic times of our lives.

First, we went out to Arizona. JJ made some of the most delicious food I have ever eaten and helped with the babies so much. McKay was in town, so we took a break from the Black Ops marathon with Evan to go out to ride the train and pan for gold at the ghost town, go swimming, and grill and chill.

Then Ev, the babies and I drove up to Utah. Austin, Sade, Chan, and Blondie drove up in another car. It was the first real test of long-road driving with both kids, and they surprised me by being pretty easy. Utah was seriously amazing. We camped, hiked, shot guns, bows & arrows, jumped on trampolines, sat in hot tubs, drove four-wheelers and dune buggies, rode bikes, got fountain drinks, did some crafting, and made 4 million trips to Walmart. Utah can be so beautiful and it was great to see everyone.

We went hiking, camping, roller coastering, shopping, scrapbooking, sewing, bicycling, walking in the rain, four-wheeling, dune-buggying, movie watching, and so much more.


While we were there, Zola had so many cousins to play with. I hardly saw her. She was off adventuring (as evidenced by the bruises,) But, when I got her back entirely to myself at the end of the two weeks, I was surprised at how grown up and full of attitude she was. Baby-zilla, for sure! With double the vocabulary and a skill set that takes ordinary life and makes it a roller coaster.

We went back to Arizona for one last week just to wrap up our loose ends and get ready for the great drive. The gravity of our undertaking started to hit me. Ugh. What had we done?

Mark was doing everything in his power to make things less stressful for me. He drove every single mile through New Mexico, Colorado, Nebraska, Iowa, Illinois, Indiana and finally, Ohio. About the time we reached Iowa (2 days before we got here) I started to relax a little. Iowa was really pretty rolling hills of corn fields with these gorgeous romantic looking farms... and it sort of chilled me out (even though we saw plenty of pretty country before that.) I don't know why.


We sort of "camped" in a hotel while we sorted out the final details on our place in Ohio. By the time we could move in and get our shipping containers delivered, we had 48 hours until Mark's parents were expected to visit. Much of our items didn't survive the trip, so during that time, we bought a new couch and kitchen table and made six trips to target, unpacked the kitchen, living room, bathroom, and all but 5 or so boxes in each of the kids room and our room left to unpack.

We ended up renting a two bedroom condo in Lakewood. It's a block off of Lake Erie, but a little over a mile from the big recreation areas attached to the lake in either direction from us. This town is a dense, urban area much like our old neighborhood in L.A., so we feel like the transition to the slower paced rural lifestyle will be less obvious at first. I'll share some more pictures when I get a little more unpacked and can find the cord that connects my camera to the computer (or even still, the camera.)

Mark made this video about it... please enjoy.

viola's first two weeks

So, first a couple of cute notes about Zola... she says "milk" like "coke" and loves her baby sister. She strokes her hair, rocks her in her swing, and pokes her in the eye. She sleeps like a stink bug and loves her blanket and pillow very much. Her favorite toys are her books (just like her dad) and she loves doggies and her soccer ball. Her most commonly used phrases are "here you go" and "all done." Depending on context, these two things can articulate almost any point.

Viola is as sweet as she looks. She quietly stares into you and loves to be rocked. She is an amazing poop factory and has a knack for pooping like a wrestler right when her diaper is removed. I have shared a bunch of pictures from her first two weeks on FB. But, the above is a good sampling.

It was my 35th birthday today and I was treated like a queen. I'm moving into a new life, and there is too much to process, but I know that my life is changing. I'm a mother of two. I'm a primary provider for our family. I'm a lot of things that I am surprised to find myself being. But, I'm always the person who is really at the helm of my life and driving it where I want the journey to go. So, it's a little hard that I feel lately like my choices are more out of necessity than personal quest. But, I know I am doing what is right and that I will have no regrets.

it's official

New job. Check.
New city. Ba-da-boom.
New baby. Baked.
New house. Found.

snap, crackle, pop

So, on Sunday night I was sitting on the arm of my sofa saying goodnight to Cale when suddenly we both heard this "POP!" And I instantly dropped to the sofa with a pain in my ribcage. It was exactly like the first time I snowboarded when I caught the edge of the board and whipped my entire body with the force of a drawn back rubber band into the snow ribcage first with my wallet in my pocket in the exact same spot where the pain was now.

I pretty much knew what happened. That spot has been hurting for a few weeks. I think the bone was still weak from the snow boarding thing, and my rib cage has been expanding to make room for little bundle of soccer player joy #2. Well, one swift well-placed kick later, and I'm down.

Mark had already left for work with the car, and I knew that they would just give me pain pills and send me home if I went to the Urgent Care or ER. So I took a percocet I had in the cabinet (judge me if you want) and had Caleb help me get into bed. The next day, I couldn't get out of bed. So, I had Mark lift me and take me straight from bed to my OB's office... his nurses sent me to the ER, and the ER gave me the once over, a subjective diagnosis matching my own (since X-Ray benefit would not outweigh the risk to radiating the baby) and a shot of morphine. I went back to my doctors office for some long-term monitoring of the baby's heart rate and movement. And then, I went home with a prescription to rest for a week as still as possible to allow the rib to knit in time (8 weeks) to avoid needing a cesarean.

So, for the past 4 days, I have just sat on the couch either sleeping off my pain pills or watching TV/Movies. It really hurt A LOT (and continues to hurt in intervals.) But, I got this rare opportunity to get to know my daughter a little better. When I go to work, she's asleep. When I get home, she's worn out from daycare, hungry, needs a diaper change, and is generally not in good spirits. I usually see a grumpy, tired whiner.

But, in the mornings she wakes up so happy. She babbles to the world about everything, plays fun games with herself and anyone who is paying attention, and has such a big, bright and beautiful heart. It helped that I couldn't have anything to do with her care because I couldn't lift her, so I really just got to be a spectator and watch this little sweet thing be herself. She's got such an imagination. She's so full of spirit and spunk. She has a sense of humor and a whole spectrum of emotions (other than grump!) It was a big payday for me to see this about her. I love her unconditionally, and I have never minded that she gives me her off-mood in the evenings. I've heard the fairy tales from her dad and other care givers about her sweetness. But, it was really nice to see it for myself.

I took a test drive to take Caleb to pick her up from daycare to see if I could tolerate the bumpy roads of LA and driving the car. And I did okay. I think I'm ready to go back to work tomorrow. I'm thankful that this happened, even though it hurt like a swear word. Because I got to know my daughter a little better. And I was a really haggard and tired pregnant lady no matter how well I was fooling myself and everyone else. So the long afternoon naps on the couch were really, really, really nice.

Back to real life, now.

mish-mash rehash

For Z's first year, I had her pictures taken every month. Since her first b-day, I have cut back to every 3 months. Here are her "15 Month" pictures, although rescheduled technically during her 16th month due to illness. She is starting to feel more toddler-y and less baby-y now that she has 7 teeth and enough hair for full-on piggy tails. She can stand on her own, but refused to do so for pictures. Maybe next time.

I should have baby shower pictures soon. My Indian-themed party was so nice. We had cake, Indian food, a fruit blessing, and games. My favorite was the make-and-take craft. We made home-made bath salts in baby jars and decorated them all Martha-y. It was so much fun. Mark even came for a few minutes before he had to go to sleep.

I think the illness that has been constant at our house is, after almost an entire month, finally gone. Yay. We all are still coughing, but no one feels bad anymore. And we are back to our routines.

I am very preoccupied with logistical planning, financial planning (I got my annual bonus Friday and as of now have a $0 credit card balance) and feeling very pregnant these days. I am settling in at work, which means I am busy and the time is flying by more quickly again.

A lot is going on with Zola. This is always true, I guess. She is on day 12 without a pacifier and is down to only 1 bottle per day, with the hope that she will start drinking from the sippy cup someday. She can get the liquid out, but she doesn't like it. So, she just throws it when you offer. She is saying "go," "up," "wow," "yeah" and "look at that." She is hitting a lot, and we are completely at a loss for how to treat it. This is one of those times that it would be so much easier to conventionally parent, because we would know how to handle these things. She is learning how to brush her teeth. She can climb the stairs, bring a spoon (with food still on it) to her mouth, drink from a cup with help, wipe stuff with a rag to clean it, pick up her toys and put them in the bin (with coaxing,) and walk with help. She still prefers to hold two hands when walking. If you only give her one, sometimes she's fine. But, usually she'll sit down and crawl because she just doesn't feel stable and her balance is very important to her. Tvisha has a car that kids can get in and push with their feet. Zola can open the door, crawl up into the seat and turn to sit properly, shut the car door, and then goes crazy steering the car wheel (which does nothing.) She can also climb up into a chair, turn switches, press buttons with one finger, turn several pages of a book at once, answer your questions with babble, open and close tupperware lids, and defeat simple child-proofing devices. She is starting to assert some strong food preferences and cries like you're beating her if you try to give her something she doesn't like. And she seems to be back to sleeping most of the time through the night.

Baby #2 is growing on track with Zola at this point, according to the doctor. So, I might get to have another giant baby. Everyone is betting she'll come early, though. I am already having a couple of Braxton-Hicks per day.

fave

This picture of my mom and dad when they were first starting their lives together reminds me of Mark's Valentine's Day gift to me... He reminded me of the times when we were young, naive, and silly in love.

Mark and I think that Valentines Day is for people who suck at expressing their love and appreciate for each other every other day of the year. We don't celebrate it, in other words. But, because it has been harder to find the time for dates, thank yous, and because we are both pulled at both ends by the demands of life... this year we both gave each other something. Ironically, we gave each other almost exactly the same surprise. We told each other the story of us, in our own way. I gave him a small picture book with every picture ever taken of both of us together along with a little children's story of mom & dad that he can read to our girls, and I told him that he could name the new baby the name he likes. He gave me a long, eloquent, deeply personal love letter telling me about how our history together has shaped our future to be awesome... and the ends says that we should name the new baby the name I like.

Now we both have insight into how our lives have impacted each other and still no clue what to call our new little one.

28 weeks

My friends, who are also throwing me a traditional Indian party for my baby shower in a couple of weeks, pitched in their wedding jewelry and the dress outfit I am wearing for these pictures to celebrate my entré into the 3rd trimester.

The gift the universe keeps on giving is is a cold that I haven't been able to kick for weeks, which continually reminds me that my last will and testament is out of date. I believe that I may, in fact, be the first woman to suffer the much more serious and even life-threatening "man cold." I've never coughed this hard (until I actually throw up on myself!) or hurt this bad (that I dip my entire face in hot water to relieve the sinus pressure!). Ugh.

And did I mention that I'm in the 3rd trimester of pregnancy? This means I am suddenly and completely physically miserable from the neck down in ways unimagineable. My darling blossom is defying gravity by standing on my spine and poking her head straight out as realistically depicted in the diagrams shown here:

Oh, and Zola has some kind of stomach virus and is throwing up and peeing out her butt with a fever.

In generally, what I'm saying is that it's a really joyful time at our house.

[Editors Note 3/8: As of today, we have been properly verbally abused by both my doctor and Zola's doctor for waiting too long to finally jam pack our cupboards with antibiotics. Zola has severe dehydration, stomach flu, 2 teeth coming in, and an ear infection and I have a seriously advanced sinus infection, e.g. tooth and neck nerves are involved and I can't open my right eye all the way. Don't be so foolish. When you or your baby doesn't recover within 5-7 days, just go to the doctor. No need to wait three weeks to "tough it out.")

baby steps

Zola took her first two shakey steps to independence on Monday evening. She's been getting closer and closer. She still prefers to crawl because she really lacks the confidence to venture off without something to hold onto... the balance and coordination is there. But, she just reminds me of me when I was trying to "drop in" at the skatepark for the longest time. I had no doubt in my mind that I could do it and that my fear of failure was the only thing holding me back.

I can't tell you how my whole chest swells when this little pooper does something magnificent like put a spoon level to her mouth without dumping the contents or weaponizing the thing. It's a heart-stopper, each and every acheivement. I get a little tear in my eye or a tug at my heart. And it's not like she's discovering some secret to world peace or curing all that ailes the world. Half the time she's just accomplishing the most ordinary thing that everyone under 85 years of age takes for granted.

Our #2 is really rocking out in there. No, literally. We went to a concert and she was really rocking out. She danced continually for over an hour. I had my 28 week check up today. I'm doing fine, but started gaining weight in some serious way... so now I'm feeling like all this work at the gym to keep things in check is pointless. If the baby needs weight, the baby will have what she wants. Just like Zola... asserting herself right up in there. At least I know I'll have the commitment at the gym for losing it afterward. That's comforting.

Anyway, more later.

the root of my square root of two.

I just realized it's been a while since I talked about math. Let me tell you about the exponential function. It models those situations where one axis has change that is disproportionately different from the other axis. So, let's take an example. One axis (horizonal line above) is pretty constant... lets say it's time... which (believe it or not) only goes at one speed no matter whether you're having fun or not. Then the other axis represents something that occurs more frequently every day at the rate of whatever it was yesterday times by the number of days since it started really increasing like nut-balls. In this example, this is the verticle axis and it represents all the crazy new things Zola learns everyday.

The square root of two is totally opposite of the exponential function. It's when things happen less frequently every day, like the number of things you can remember as you get old.

At one point, we were a family of two, but now we are a square root of more like 3.65... which is an irrational number around 1.91. But, since Zola has the energy of at least 5 average adults and has developed a football tackle relationship with Akira... I feel like we live with He-man and her side-kick cat. Especially the way she wields the remote like a sword and likes to hit people in the face with it.

She is still not walking, and no one is really looking forward to the time that she does. Because we can all see how correlated that will be with climbing. She already pulls out the drawers and climbs into them, climbs up on her toys and stands higher to get a better view out the window, and is trying to get her knee up on the (glass) coffee table. So many things to bolt down, screw in, and re-surface.

Meanwhile, her language skills are out of this world. Here are a few samples of things she regularly says in correct context:

"Hello" --When someone comes into the room or the phone rings

"Right there" --Where is you pacifier?

"All done." --Do you want more?

"No" --Can I have it?

"Yum, Yum" --Do you want some food?

"Up" or "Down" (depending on which she currently is)
"Kitty" (Pointing to the cat)

"Daddy!" (When he comes in the room)

Caleb is here for a while to help us with childcare and she just adores him. So do we. He really takes some of the stress off of me and Mark and makes it so we can spend more time together. Our house is so small, that I feel bad for making him sleep in the closet... but he seems to appreciate being here. The weather is great and there is a lot to do. Plus, even though Zola is more work than ever before, it's a little more fun now that she communicates and asserts herself. And she is really great at helping you figure out what she wants.

sequel at 20 weeks

I haven't written much about sequel. This is what we are calling baby #2 until we select a name. We have tossed around a few names, but I think I decided not to tell anyone (except Mark) what my final decision is until she is born. I get to ignore fewer peoples' opinions that way.

So, she's about 10 inches long now and I can feel her squirming. For some reason, at this stage when she moves a lot, it feels so strange: like vertigo and starvation and nausea and a swift change in blood pressure all at once. I feel a little guilty, because I know I had more time to talk to, dream about, plan for, and read up on Zola in the womb than I do this one. She is entering a competitive market where Zola has become very accustomed to having the monopoly.

That part is a little scary because Tvisha and Zola have always been very sweet to each other... until lately. Zola has gotten assertive and knows how to push, hit, bite, grab, etc and territorial about everything (toys, mom, food, etc.) So, Tvisha has figured out that she doesn't have to treat her soft like a little baby anymore. Every time they are together it's an episode of earth shattering screaming everytime anyone touches anyone, even with love. I think the thing that makes me cring the most is that our two children will be almost exactly the age difference between Tvisha and Zola, so it's a little like looking into a crystal ball at my life in two years. Let me hit the lottery and get two children who love each other and never fight. (Ha ha.)

Maybe it's because I don't have time to dwell on anything, but this pregnancy has been a piece of cake so far. She's not "on my nerves" yet.

We're having my sister in law here for a couple of weeks and then Caleb will come for a while to help us with childcare and getting everything prepared for her arrival. There is not much to do right this moment, but keeping up with the standard things has become hard for some reason. I have such a wonderful family!

Oh, and Zola is feeling better. She had a high fever, double ear infection, and high-pitched scream all last week and is on antibiotics and back to her sweet, happy self.

edit: Even my posts about sequel are about Zola.