weekend wonderful

We took a quick trip up the coast overnight and got a hotel in Morro Bay outside San Luis Obispo. It was so relaxing and incredible to be able to spend so much time with my husband.

We had some nice conversations on the scenic drive, saw some vineyards, and stopped for chocolate milkshakes.

This little country restaurant was so good that we went there for BOTH dinner the night we arrived AND breakfast the day we departed. I bet they have other good restaurants, but we obviously don't care. I ordered the meat loaf sandwich and Mark thought it sounded nasty... and then heartily helped me eat it. It was amazing.

This beach was walking distance from our hotel. I walked down while Mark took a nap the first day and we went together the morning we left... and that time, there was so much beautiful fog that you couldn't see the haystack at all. It was a nice, kind of isolated beach. I found FOUR perfect sand dollars just laying on the beach within 5 feet of each other. A great place for treasure hunting.

month four

I'm sure, Internet, you are thrilled to find out about the sex of the baby. So I must divulge. I'm sure you are just dying in anticipation. But first, let me just say how things have been going.

All downhill... for now. This month has been such a piece of cake. I am rounding out a little bit, with my muffin top growing at proportionally the same rate of speed as my bump so as to just make me look generally round... no basketball shoplifting over here.

I am eating every two hours by mandate of my body... although with the whole muffin top observation, I have started writing everything down so that I will be tempted to pick up "apple" instead of "potato chips."

Here are some random items that I have craved:

• Fish Tacos from Rubios



• Dill Pickles



• Salt on everything



• Anything w/ Italian tomato-based sauce (lasagna, spagetti, pizza, etc)



• Salt & Vinegar Chips



• Potatoes (instant mashed makes a quick snack)



• Sandwiches with everything.



• Avocado



• Garlic Bread



• Jalapenos

Anyhoo, listed like that -- it does seem to have a pattern: tangy carbs. Mmmm. Tangy. Carbs. Apples just aren't tangy carbs.

I am still looking pretty good. No crazy complexion/pigmentation issues. No swollen limbs. No hair falling out. Pretty much, if it weren't for the failed diet hiding in my shirt, you'd never know. I'd know. It's hard not to notice the change in blood pressure everytime I shift position, the weird sensations, dizziness, headache, etc. Plus, I've started feeling the baby rolling around sometimes when I sit still. It still feels a little like a tummy rumble, but in the wrong place for my stomach. Granted, my stomach HAS moved... up in my ribcage. And those rumbles kind of freak me out because it feels like a heart attack. This has been the month of figuring how how in the hay we're going to pay for everything. I think I have us sorted a little bit. Surely there will be some surprises. But, at least we have a plan.

Speaking of surprises, some people would rather not know the sex before the baby is born. Not us. We had to know. Our doctor is 90% sure we are having a... click here to find out.

wow - wow - wow - wow - wow

The greater the failure on the road to success, the sweeter the reward. I am gleaming, beaming, realing, crying, flying, soaring, swelling, proud of myself. I have PASSED Exam 2 (of 9) on my fourth attempt. As is my custom, I will post my actual score when I get it in eight weeks.

There are not a lot of opportunities in one's life that truely confirm your own awesomeness. Whenever I get one, I try to gloat, posture, and trip over my own fabulousness as much as possible. Because for a short time, no one can argue that I really am kick butt.

Ah, happy, happy, joy, joy.

exam season's greatest hits

I am up to 3-4 hours per day of study. This is what I should always be doing, but I usually fizzle out at the 2 hour mark. I guess the 2nd trimester and the reintroduction of coffee has really improved my focus. (Don't worry, I'm only having one 1/2 decaf cup and my doctor says it's okay.)

The last few weeks have been a bit crazy... as always is the case as the exam approaches (next Thurs for anyone curious.) I have continued, as is my custom, to have a life. I just don't take as much care in documenting it as I normally would. I don't have any pictures from my "girls' night" at Mamma Mia! (on stage.) The music and costumes were great, but (and I can't believe the blasphemy of this statement) the movie was better.

The same weekend, I went to the circus for the first time, ever. It was small, but having nothing to compare it to, I was the most value for $10 I've had in a long, long time. A little of everything, and plenty of "akkk - don't die!" moments.

A highlight is that right after the show, Madhuri gave me a big bag of these maternity clothes.... pretty much everything I will need. Study, study, study and fast forward to last weekend... my BFF in college, Tiffany (who now lives 2 hours away in the desert) came, picked me up, and I had a weekend vacation on her turf. She took me for a day trip to Lake Isabella and a quaint town called Kernville where we shopped in some antique stores, got lunch and visited an old museum.

We spent a lot of time catching up on three years time, just hanging out at her place. We also got a drive through tour of the Naval base that she has been working at for the past couple of years as a civilian mathematician for the DOD. Then she drove me back to town and we caught a few hours at the Page Natural History Museum (Tar Pits) which I found out I get free admission through my work! You can look into the area where they are cleaning a big find, including a well preserved columbian mammoth. The tusk is longer than I am tall, I think.

As far as the whole preggers thing goes, I feel significantly better... appetite, energy, etc. Still wouldn't characterize any part of my life as "normal" -- but I can handle this part. I am infinitely greatful for the massage chair topper I got for christmas. I am trying not to think about everything too much (study, study) for now, which is hard. I let myself read a bit today and while sitting very still reading, I felt something. A flutter. Not gas. A flutter! It's early but within the range of plausibility - I think I felt the baby move! Wow. Still no pic of the bump to share. It just feels like the pizza and burritos I was once able to 'suck in' is now sitting out several inches - and who wants to see that? I know, fans. You do. Trust me. No one wants me to be a cute pregnant more than I do. But, you know not everyone has a cute little bump. I want to be one of those ladies who is normal from the back and then she turns around and you think - "wow... she's smuggling a basketball... I wasn't expecting that." But, I'm pretty sure that I'm going to swell up everywhere (given the current disappearance of my waist from every angle.) Don't worry. I will definitely post a pic - but let's just let it get it past the point of being mis-identified as a failed diet/exercise plan first.

Study, study, etc. Now you are all caught up to date and I should go study some more.

month three

We're still splitting hairs about how my estimated due date. Regardless of whether it is Nov 2, 4, 7, or 9... the title of the post puts this a few days early. But, you don't care. Right, fans?

Look at that thumb sucker up there. The head is left, highlights are forehead, nose, and jaw. You can see the bones of the individual fingers - 7 of them... (we got excited for a famous pianist until it occurred to us that it is probably the overlap of two hands) the spine and pelvis. The darker spot in the chest is the heart, which again I got to see flickering away. I kind of thought it was a pretty good picture.

Everyone is wondering... it's too early to determine the sex. We will try to see on ultrasound next month. We're crossing our fingers for a girl (hemophilia being the only factor) but we will be happy no matter what.

At the beginning of this month, I felt more pregnant than ever! Symptoms, symptoms, symptoms. But toward the end, I can tell that I'm turning the 1st trimester corner and starting to feel a tiny bit better. I still feel like the smallest trivial task leaves me ready for a nap (I have to lay down for a few minutes after getting breakfast & a shower in the morning before work.) Based on taste tests, I think my body's aversion to some of my favorite foods may be moving on.

We went to San Diego last week and (due to constant napping) I had not clean clothes to pack. So, I tried on the maternity pants that my friend had given to me... thinking they would drown me. Ahhhh. The relaxed waist band. The most amazing invention of all time. It made me realize how tight my clothes have become... and that I'm ready for that awkward stage where I have to choose between hoping no one notices my pants are not even zipped at all or constantly hiking up my maternity pants. Since I have a pair of work appropriate maternity pants, I went that route this week.

In San Diego we walked A LOT. Everyone says walking is the best pregnant exercise. However, toward mid-day, my tummy feel a "not-right" pulling feeling that made me decide it was time to go to our beach hotel and lay on the sand for the rest of the day. (yay! for beach hotels.) I called my doctor when we got home because I kept having the feeling whenever I walk at all. He assured me that everything else sounded fine and that I might have pulled a muscle. I opted to wait until my regular appointment on Friday to get it checked, because it didn't "hurt" -- it just worried me. I even went home from work early one day to rest. At the appt, my doctor again impressed me with how awesome he is. He actually read my chart before coming in to see me / remembered that I was the one who called. He said everything was FINE, but that I will keep having the pulling. It's probably the weight of my uterus pressing on scar tissue on my ovary from my old surgery. No big deal. And it shouldn't effect our travel plans in late May - St. Louis for Josh's wedding / Houston to see McKay.

first couple months

Ya'll may have already seen this picture on Facebook, but here is the 1st ultrasound at 7 weeks. Now that the secret is out, I will catch everyone up and then post monthly updates on how things are going.

Month 1: We found out. Early-ish because we were trying. I did not do anything crazy to tell Mark. I just called him at work at 6:30 am and said "I'm pregnant." He was really excited! He turned to his friend Gabe and said, "DUDE! MY WIFE IS PREGNANT!!!" Wow. I did some research on my health insurance and found Dr. Right. Google, you really do have everything. I was already taking prenatals and trying to eat healthy, so the only thing that changed was the freaky stuff happening to my body: FATIQUE, a bunch of bloody noses, weird circulation sensations, and eventually perpetual nausea. Regarding cravings, mexican food (which Mark would argue has nothing to do with the pregnancy,) chocolate milk, and saltine crackers.

I took a profile picture of my tummy -- sucking in, so I don't start out already looking a few months pregnant. But, lets be realistic. I had a pizza and burritos stockpile sufficient for someone to suggest I was already "showing." That picture will go to the grave with me. Sorry, fan base.

Month 2: This went by fast, despite the fact that I could have vomited on you at any moment. I got really picky about foods because the only time I actually threw up was when I put the wrong thing in. I rarely even got to swallow it. It and everything in my stomach would go. Mark had enormous fun talking about runny eggs everytime I went a little green. Thanks for your support, hon. You're the greatest.

My schedule got all out of whack. I would sleep from dinner to morning, study during my best energy times, work for a few hours, nap at lunch, and then work a few more hours and go home to eat and pass out again. If I didn't call you, I'm sorry. I probably fell asleep. Ironically, WITHOUT COFFEE, I became a morning person (I already hate the baby.)

Month 3 ends in 8 days, so I will post that later.

it's in there

nonsense

Kazi is always wheezing and coughing, and we are already convinced that he smokes at least a pack a day of cigarettes. But after this well timed snap, I have to wonder... Should I buy one of those home drug tests to see what drugs he's smoking? He does throw up a lot, too. What drugs make you wheeze AND throw up?

termites

...Ate the piano that someone freecycled me, so I did not pick it up. It's better this way. I can't play when Mark's asleep, we have no where to put it, and it was going to need some costly repair anyway. So, sometime we'll get a keyboard that I can wear headphones to play, shove under the bed with everything else, and get a warranty for. Ah the bliss of being practical.

In the meantime, I'm feeling pretty good. Things are moving steadily along, if you know what I mean. [Insert the standard comment about being busy here.] Hopefully I will get to study more soon. But, I talked to my VP about how I can't be held accountable if they don't give me ample time to study and he pulled some strings so I won't get in trouble if I fail if I can't take my paid study hours from work. However, there is still time to catch up and pass. My exam is not until early May. Hopefully I will have some good news to share then.

square root of 3 day

It is the square root of 3 day (3*3=9... 03/03/2009 for those of you who had to have it spelled out for ya!)

It is also FAVORITE LITTLE BROTHER'S ANNIVERSARY OF COMING INTO EXISTENCE!!! Do-Howdy for pinching him out, mom. He has been a never-ending joy and one-man soap opera for Thursday years.

In other news, Facebook is slowing taking over my life. Soon, I will have no use for this blog. Just kidding. Get real! ME? "Bringing You Square Root Of Two Goodness Since 2005." We've come too far together to give up this relationship over some new sexy fling with Facebook. In internet terms, we're seasoned professionals.

As you may have guessed, I've been spending a lot of time trying to find excuses not to study, hanging w/ The Man, and trying to take better care of myself. You know how it goes. Put yourself last for too long and suddenly you realize you're almost out of plastic grocery bags to change the cat litter with, there's no room in the trash for the pizza box, and you're out of paper plates. Mmmm, pizza.

But, you've really let things slide. And despite the forthcoming tremendous refund you are expecting due to accidently paying an extra $300 per month in taxes all last year, I still haven't finished filing them - and it's not like I haven't already bought TurboTax and walked through all the steps. I just have to print and sign them, and it's taken me two weeks!

Oh, and someone Freecycled me a piano. A PIANO! How awesome is that? I think it needs some cosmetic repair, but I'll post pics after we pick it up tomorrow.

McKay, facebook

You probably know that my brother McKay is in the hospital. With such a large family with varying degrees of communication, all information about how he is doing and what happened has been second or third hand, and everyone is worried and red-eyed. I have been getting text messages from Kim, and talked to her and McKay on the phone yesterday. Since my info is first hand, and Kim has to leave McKay's hospital room to return phone calls, I have set up a Facebook Group to post any info she sends me and to provide a forum for others to do the same. I chose Facebook because it is private, repecting the fact that he is a police officer and that people might wrongly use information posted about his welfare. And it is collaborative, allowing anyone invited to post photos, updates, notes, prayers, thoughts, jokes, links to news stories, etc. And it has a live feed notifying you if anyone posts anything so you don't have to keep checking email.

If you would like to be invited to join this group, please email me at mona (dot) mccowen (at) gmail (dot) com. If you know someone who may not read my blog and should be added, same thing. LET ME KNOW! People are more stressed when they don't know what is happening and have to speculate.

If you have never used Facebook, you will need to sign up (it's free) and get a user ID and password. If I am in your email address book, it will automatically ask you to make me your friend and this will notify me that you are joined. You can either search for the group 'I <3 McKay' and request to be added or I will automatically add you as soon as I see that you have joined. I will not add you if you are not at least 3nd degree family unless Kim first approves.

If you would like to help me dispense information to the few that are not internet accessible, I can forward text message updates sent to me by Kim if I have phone numbers and for those who do not have text, I would like to start a phone tree.

ollie

Last night, we went out to see Oliver Stone speak at an event at Scott's work. We arrived early so that we could help Scott with whatever he needed setting up, and were glad we did because the place was pretty packed by the time the event started, and we got seats in the front. I did not know much about the man before the event, but he was really disarmingly funny, charming, well-read, and interesting. I was also struck by the plague of celebrité. I would hate to have fans. Okay. Fine. I realize you are reading this. I should say more fans.

free therapy

Crafts make me happy. By that, I mean... I can avoid costly in-patient mental evaluations if I only continue to self medicate with the proper amount of designer paper and cleverly creative project ideas. Today's awesome therapy session will actually relax me later, too.

I made coconut & tea tree oil sea salt scrub. If you want to make some, too - here's how:

All you really need is 1:2 (any) oil & (any) salt/sugar. Salt is scrubbier, sugar is gentler. Optionally, you can add essential body oils - 5 drops per 1/2 cup of oil.

I made mine following this formula:

1/8 c. Virgin Coconut Oil

1/8 c. Virgin Olive Oil

1/4 c. Grapeseed Oil

1 c. Sea Salt (no iodide )

1/4 c Epsom Salts

5 drops Bergamot (100% Pure Essential Oil)

5 drops Tea Tree Oil

Simply stir together (I heated the coconut oil first for 5 seconds just to soften, mixed the oils first, added the salts, stirred, and then added the drops.) I found most of the ingredients in the regular grocery store/drug store. The essential oil was in a local drug store, but I had to check a few before I found one that carried them. The Tea tree oil and coconut oil were found at a local health food store. I plan to use the left over oils to cook with because they are the "good fat" type oils.

I already made some bath salts a while back by mixing just the epsom salts with the bergamot and they were awesome and gone really fast.

Last week, I experimented trying to make something for my hair resembling with the goal being like Schwarzkopf Mess Up. I melted in the microwave a few spoonfuls of Murphy's Superior Hair Dressing Pomade which is basically just bees wax and too heavy for my hair. When it was liquid, I used my blender to whisk in some L'Oreal Studio Heat Seeker Hot Straight until fluffy and the desired weight of the product I wanted - a soft tacky cream. The end results is the perfect product for my hair. I'm a bit bummed that it is a disgusting yellow color and separates a little bit. It isn't as pretty as the Mess Up, but it works just as well and I could make a gallon of it for under $10 - the real thing is usually $18 for 4 ounces. Next time, I will use a different wax to make it clear.

What's next, you ask? Why all the emphasis on relaxing? Why, because study season is back in full force, is a horse, of course. Which is a matter of remorse, I source, unless of course it's the famous "wish I'm dead."

i can't say it better than he can

"I don’t particularly like it when people put words in my mouth, either, by the way, unless I say it"

"One year ago today, the time for excuse-making has come to an end"

"I promise you I will listen to what has been said here, even though I wasn’t here"

"I’ve coined new words, like "misunderstanding"

"My job is a decision-making job, and as a result, I make a lot of decisions"

"I think we agree, the past is over"

(Don't get me wrong. I don't expect Obama to do it better, just more eloquently.)

not bitter

I'm done grieving over my overwhelming failure on my exam. I got my score and I was one point away from passing. That makes me feel better. Sorry, internet, if I hurt your feelings with my last post. It was written in ironic humor, laughing while writing. The Man said it came out sounding mean. This is exactly what Evan is talking about when he says that The Man is the most persevering human on the planet (to deal with me for so many years.)

So, the reason for this post is last night's dinner.... I may not have mentioned that my new crusade is to make homemade, healthy dinner - 4 nights out of 5.

I had all this cheesy chicken and broccoli casserole leftover from Monday that I didn't think I could keep eating every meal. So, did this:

Chopped up the casserole.
Added 1/2 cup cottage cheese.
Wrapped it into Wonton Wrappers
Fried the little packages in olive oil & sesame oil
Separately fried up a package of fresh, spicy ramen
Added some veggies, water chestnuts.
and served the two in complement.

It was awesome, but way more calories that I thought. A good treat on day-off-the-diet Day (which yesterday wasn't.)

for all those people who said, "just think positive"

May you all experience your own devastating failure and have someone say, "you'll get it next time."

re:solution

i do not feel like i need to tell you how awesome christmas was. i don't think christmas cannot never be not-awesome, if you know what i mean. they should call it awesomemas. new years is another matter. sometimes new years sucks. i'm just sayin cuz it's happened. it's not 100% guaranteed to rock the chimney the way awesomemas is. so, it's worth mentioning that new years this year KICKED BUTT! Not in the fireworks and champagne days of yore way. But in a 'hanging w/ my man and chilling in the snow' sort of way.

First, we spent all night hanging out. He showed me where he worked, and I finally got to see how completely understated it is when he says that he sees deer. (They sit 20 feet from his office and let you walk within 5-10 feet of them.)

Then, AFTER I had been up for over 24 hours, we realized that we both had the same day off. This has only one meaning at our house: road trip! We went to the mountains early (delightfully beating the rush.)

I showed Mark how to make a snowball and sat still while he threw them at me. (I only have one bruise from before I showed him that you make them out of the soft snow, not the ice you kick loose from the curb. ha ha.)

We did not make that snowman. We just found him and played with him.

the front usually doesn't fall off, for one.

Youtube is a rare expirience for me - Mark showed this to me on new years. It's really special.

never too old

When Mark saw the witch, he suggested that I should add detail to her face. The eyelashes are actually parts of a star-shaped sequin. The eyes combine a black seed bead center with white glitter and purple/black paint - covered in liquid crackle. The nose is just the stem from her apple head, and the lips are red marker w/ liquid glass over it. I took a ton of pictures before I got one in focus - and what I notice is that her eyes are totally the kind that follow you about the room. Creepy.

She is the size of my hand.

wicked tree ornament

As I mentioned last year, we are going to have a "memory" tree where all the ornaments either have some significance to the year they were purchased, or have something to do with our lives. This year, I wanted to make a mini-book honoring Mark's first novel and also have an ornament for 'Wicked: The Musical' because it not only has a message that is very important to my life in it, but I was also able to go see it 3 times, with old friends, new friends, and family. Plus, it is representative of how we are getting off the couch and taking advantage of this city more. I was going to go buy the ornament they sell at the theatre, but then I saw these cute hand made ones and decided to do this.



Her head is a wooden apple, her hat, body and boots are felt w/ sequins, her skirt is a inked poisetta flower and some old lace from my craft stash that I inked grey, her hair is yarn, and her broom head is necklace hemp. Her shirt lapel is part of the poinsetta flower base. Her legs are just some stripey scrap fabric I had from an old shirt. I happened to have those cute little bells for some reason. This took me last night and this afternoon to put together. Most of it is hand-sewn. The heavier items are hot-glued.